Counting the Reasons
by LucidInsanity
Summary: Tweek's relationship with a student teacher, ends on a terribly bad note, placing him back to a time of stuttering, and anxiety. Finding a small amount of comfort in Craig Tucker of all people was the last thing he expected, but people can surprise you..


_Disclaimer: I do not own South Park, or any of the characters, although I do adore it. Hope you enjoy the first chapter~. _

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_Tweek's pov_

"Tweek, don't make this any harder than it needs to be."

'_I'm not'_

"But I thought you loved me…"

"I did…but you know, I found someone older; my age, you were my student after all, it's better for both of us, you didn't seriously think this was permanent…did you?"

'_It's better for you, and why wouldn't I?'_

"I guess eh… not…"

"See you'll be fine, you'll find a nice girl."

'_Why even bother, if they end up just like you?'_

"With your nervous habits basically gone, you'll be breaking hearts in no time."

'_So they can go through with what I'm dealing with now?'_

"Yeah, egh! Sure I'll do that..."

"Well it was nice while it lasted, Hun."

'_I guess I thought it would last longer than this…'_

"Yeah...Bye..."

She reached in for an awkward hug, but I brushed it off as if I'd be late for class, and listened till the repetitive click of her heels disappeared; as if they'd never exist (I wish they never had). You'd think that looking at someone's back wouldn't be so miserable, but I finally know that it's probably one of the more wretched moments in my life. Deciding against my better judgment, I chose to skip class. I stepped back until I felt the rough edges of bark at my back, and the stability of the aging tree. Sliding down, and finally thudding upon the ground, I blinked rapidly and twitched (haven't done that in a while, just great).

"! Egh! I need geh! Coffee..."

My body began to shiver to life; as it used to.

'_Ah great here come the tremors'_

I always thought love had some absolution. Something about it at the time seemed so infinite, like you had no clue where it would begin and it had no true end. I thought love meant devotion, and that was a commitment; something that doesn't end so soon. _Thought; _exactly, as in past tense. All that garbage means nothing now. I'm without someone to even care if I'm pulling out my hair, or drinking so much caffeine I lose sleep, as my sanity slowly drifts out of my grasp. It's like giving a kid something new, and taking it away, not letting him know there was a time limit. I was really trying to change, you know? I tried to not be such a freak, for her, because whenever we were together I felt like if I repressed who I was, she could be proud of me. She probably thinks she 'fixed' me. All she did was make the urges to yell, to shiver; to _tweak out_ even worse. Those urges silently mocked me somewhere in my pitiful mess of a mind, to make myself look like an idiot. It was too painful to keep it in; like a prisoner in my own body, my urges scratched at the edges of my thoughts, and tormented me.

_Craig's pov_

I noticed Tweek with our substitute teacher; Miss. Renegan.

'_Whoa… Tweek scored that piece of work?'_

It was clear as day what was happening. She was leaving him for good (although I'm doubtful the poor kid did anything wrong, because she was smiling as she left). The bitch probably found someone older, that didn't have as much 'baggage' as a student. I decided to flip her off, as my usual gesture, even though she never saw the obscene hand gesture. Even so, why the fuck would you start a relationship with a student, only to end it. You jeopardize your career, and your place in society, just to go out with a student, and then you just leave them? (That's such an ass backwards logic) Teachers really are the sniveling little shits everyone puts them out to be, I kid you not. My guess is she's why he's been trying to not freak out in class, even though I know he really wants to (on account of I notice him practically bite his lower lip off, and violently tug at his shirt everyday). Since we were kids, Tweek and I have had, and odd relationship, so it's probably going to be awkward when I go cheer him up. Yes, I, Craig Tucker, give a fuck about someone (and I really do. Trust me.). I noted Tweek's tremors, as he violently twitched every so often. His eyes looked really heavy, like he hadn't slept, contemplating this whole ordeal ahead of time.

'Poor kid...'

I silently poised myself on the other side of the tree, and let the autumn breeze rush through my hair. Letting the moment truly sink in I closed my eyes as well, and enjoyed that simple moment, while I still could.

"OH JESUS! SOMEONE'S GOING TO WALK BY AND THINK I KILLED THIS PERSON- AUGH...then I'll have to go to jail, and then I won't have any future, and egh! TOO MUCH PRESSURE!!!"

The phrase my music to my ears as my eyes burst open, looking up only to see Tweek's worried countenance; hovering over my own.

"Craig…..are you –augh! Okay….?"

For a moment I couldn't think; my breath hitched in my throat at the site of the twitching fiend. Tweek's eyes were the prettiest green I'd probably ever see in my life. I'm surprised I hadn't noticed them until that moment. I guess until that point, I'd always participated in life by going through the actions, not particularly feeling much for anything, but this time, I actually felt something for the moment. My whole life, all I ever did was sit back and observe, and I finally saw something through my eyes, that made me want to try at this jumbled up thing we call life.

"Craig…?"

Looking up, I was finally warped back into reality, away from my thoughts for the time being. Straightening my shirt, I placed my hand on Tweek's shoulder as his eye twitched shut, and I hoisted myself up swiftly.

"Yeah I'm good. Thanks…"

"….."

"I hate to say this, and trust me, I really do; but shouldn't we be getting back to class?"

"Ah...-eh! Yes….but AUGH! I'm not feeling well, so I didn't really want to, but EH! Perhaps I should go..."

He began to walk towards the school door, and I grabbed him by the wrist, and began walking the opposite way. I felt the bundle of nerves twitch through the connection of our hands.

"Craig...-AUGH! Where are we going?"

The frantic boys face tensed up, and looked positively perplexed. I looked and let a sincere smile, play its way on my face.

"Let's just skip today, I know of some places we can go."

"We –EGH! Can't skip, we'll get in trouble, then –ACK! Get written up, t-then my parents will AHH! Kill me!"

"No they won't, don't worry, I assure you that everything will be fine, just come with me and have some fun, for one day Tweek, what do you say?"

"-AUGH! Okay…. But…"

I stopped for a minute and turned to him, watching as his gaze was glued to the ground, as he pulled feverishly at his shirt.

"Why...-egh! Are you -ERGK..being so nice to me..?"

I shrugged my shoulders, and kept guiding him to my car out in the parking lot. To be perfectly honest, I had no clue why I was showing Tweek such kindness. It certainly wasn't pity, because I can't tolerate that shit..Something about being with Tweek at the moment appealed to me more than going to a pointless class at the time. Unlocking the door, I motioned for him to get in. Sitting in the car, I buckled up, and waited for Tweek to as well, then turned the key, bringing the engine to life. My radio played in a barely audible dull sound, and I looked over to Tweek.

"…Hey Tweek…"

"Egh! …Yes?"

"The answer to your question…."

He simply nodded at me, keeping his eyes fixated only on me. In accordance, I continued with a simple short amount of words.

" It's just one of those, 'Live in the moment, for the moment' kind of things, doesn't need a reason.."

With that, I looked forward, plastered my sickeningly sweet smile across my face, and pressed my foot on the pedal, as I peeled out of the high school parking lot."

Little did I know at that moment, my life would never be the same. Much like anyone's life, the cogs of change were creaking within me. They soon would be turning at a steady pace, and no one or thing would be able to stop said changes from occurring.

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_Please R&R, it would be much appreciated. Your criticisms help my writing immensely. This wont be insta-romance, hence the multi-chapters. Depending on if people enjoy this or not, will depend on if I'll continue, or correct my mistakes on this chapter. Thank you for reading the first chapter to my story :D_


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